[drDave]

After waiting most of the day for the Barrington BMW dealer to do a yearly service, put on my new lights, etc., it became clear that they weren't going to get there. . .the loaner: a weeny BMW 600 sport scooter. I die in shame. . .

For anyone who might be remotely interested, it's like your first go-kart with a throttle; about as choppy, and with the same no-wheelbase hard hard ride. Yes it can go 50-60 mph but hit a bump? Remember what happened on your first go kart? You shot into the air. It was unsettling to be bounced 6 inches into the air. The engine sounds like Fran Drescher imitating a motor. The motor feels like it has half the kick of a 650gs

On the good side, no-body threw rocks at t. You can balance it on tip toes cuz of it has a low center of gravity (and a high center of levity).

Now I have to ride back there in a day or so. Find a paper bag to put over my helmet. . .

 

[Clem]

Reduced to a mere mortal. This post is worthless without pictures, Doc. Hand over the camera to Miss June. Better yet, her with the scooter.:001_tt2:
Hey, it could have been worse. They could have given you a bike with a failed fuel strip and you ran out of gas in a bad area. Go find a bag.

 

[drDave]

Illinois is largely under water, Clem. If the sea parts, I will take a picture of my Loaner of Shame. . .

 

[drDave]

They really missed a bet in naming it. It should have been called the BMW Selfabusa. . .There was a guy buying one at the dealership. He looked like the last time he had seen 70 was 20 years ago. . .

 

[johnvw]

Oh Dear,
I bet you missed the Freedom ......

John

 

[drDave]

I missed riding a motorcycle. . ..

 

[DJ_Fission]

At least you got a loaner....

 

[drDave]

I'd feel better if the License Plate didn't read: TNY PNIS. . .well it feels like it does anyway. . .

 

[drDave]

Sure enough. Here's the license plate:

 

[yonderbob]

Did they issue fake glasses and groucho moustache loaner too?

Scooters are DANGEROUS!

 

[drDave]

Yes and a tny pnis as well

 

[Clem]

:funnypost: You :clown: clowns are funny.
You get your beautiful Classic and your big fire hose back tomorrow.:cowboy:

 

[drDave]

That's what she said....

 

[Lawrence of Suburbia]

At least the scooter got you there and back drD! On my first service a few weeks back I was loaned a Honda 400cc four - a bit of a change!

On the way back to the dealer to collect my bike, and on a very busy Motorway, the loaner ran out of both oil and fuel. The crank-case could have been used as a bbq plate!

Not amused! The dealer brought my bike out on a trailer and took away the offending Honda! Never heard of anything like it.

Guess where the next service will be done...

Lawrence of Suburbia

Outer Brisbane, SE Queensland, Australia

2012 R1200R: Montego Blue with ABS, ESA, RDC, OBC, Puig rear hugger, Stebel Magnum horn, Grip Puppies, ss oil-cooler guard, Abdeckring installed, Wunderlich ‘Trophy’ fairing.

 

[drDave]

My scooter loaner of shame. . .now back at the dealer; they took my "plate" and said it would guaranteed go on the back of one of their employees' bikes. . .

 

[RapidRider]

What drDave is leaving out is that he was offered a different loaner, the water cooled GS.

 

[drDave]

I am about 4 inches too short for the Ugliboxer. At 5'9" I could sit on the short suspension GS without a problem, but at the dealers, it felt topheavy and uncomfortable. I'm waiting for BMW to build a 6 cylinder naked or lightly fared roadster/cruiser out of it's K1600 line. That's a sweet bike, but when you sit in the button-infested, hugely fared front, it's like sitting in a one-seater car. You can't see below the windscreen at all. That's one of the things I like about the R - you can actually see everything in front of you and it feels more like flying than riding.

 

[RapidRider]

I am about 4 inches too short for the Ugliboxer. At 5'9" I could sit on the short suspension GS without a problem, but at the dealers, it felt topheavy and uncomfortable. I'm waiting for BMW to build a 6 cylinder naked or lightly fared roadster/cruiser out of it's K1600 line. That's a sweet bike, but when you sit in the button-infested, hugely fared front, it's like sitting in a one-seater car. You can't see below the windscreen at all. That's one of the things I like about the R - you can actually see everything in front of you and it feels more like flying than riding.

I really like that idea - a K1600R

I haven't ridden the wethead, nor do I feel the need to. I like it, but one R12 is plenty. My original plan was actually to get a GS, until I saw an R in the flesh.

But we both know that in any case you still would have picked the C over the wethead as a loaner

 

[Dave]

Was the scooter really that bad? I've sat on a few at bike shows and, although never tempted to buy one, thought them quite well spec'd.

 

[drDave]

Dave,

All kidding aside, it really was bad. The suspension was like a buckboard; it jounced hard over every road imperfection. The R is plush by comparison. Really plush.

The scooter weighs as much or more than a 1200R, with half the engine; the engine is always straining and sounds like it's a gear lower than it should be for the speed. The seat in its standard position is also about an inch higher than the High Comfort Seat. The brakes are adequate, but nothing like the sandbags on the R.

I think the Sport Scooter might be OK for someone commuting in a city and who has never actually ridden the R bike. But its kind of a beta-level of refinement. Nowhere near the perception of ingot-try you get with real BMW bikes.

There was an old Bloom County Cartoon in which Opus the Penguin reviews a movie, saying that the movie

"has brought the word 'BAD' to new levels of badness. Bad acting. Bad effects. Bad everything. This film just oozed rottenness from every bad scene...Simply bad beyond all infinite dimensions of possible badness...(thinks a minute) Well, maybe not that bad, but Lord, it wasn't good."

That just about sums up my review of the BMW Sport Scooter.